On December 31, I toasted the Year of the Horse like someone who fully believed she was about to gallop into her next chapter.

January gently tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Not yet.”  I’m still in the final stretch of the Snake.  A few more things to clear to fully embrace the momentum of my Horse year.  As if I haven’t cleared enough in the past 11 months! 

The Horse doesn’t arrive until February 17. And my birthday lands on February 16, the last full day of shedding before the run begins. I didn’t plan it that way, but it feels almost too perfect.

There’s something powerful about this in-between space. That quiet stretch where you’re no longer who you were, but not quite who you’re becoming yet. It’s not dramatic. It’s the gentle recalibration where you know life is changing and finally trusting yourself to choose what comes next.

January has been a sprint in its own way. Work has been full-throttle, with growth and planning meetings, leadership conversations, and that familiar hum of building what’s next instead of maintaining what was. Professionally, I feel grounded, clear, and very much in motion, even if my heart is still taking its time tying up loose threads.

And yes, dating has officially re-entered the chat.

I went on a couple of dates that felt less like romantic prospects and more like life’s way of handing me a mirror.

The first was with a 61-year-old man who showed up dressed like he got lost on the way to a retirement seminar in the woods and spent most of the date talking about budgeting and future planning. Somewhere between “fixed income” and “downsizing,” while keeping my eye out for gators, I had a very real moment of thinking, Is this what 56 is supposed to feel like?

Because I don’t feel 56.

In my head I am more like 36…

Still dreaming in big, colorful, slightly unreasonable ways.

The second date swung the pendulum hard in the other direction… 47 years old, charming, funny, and about as emotionally mature as a frat boy with a good skincare routine. Fun? Absolutely. Grounded? Not even a little.

And somewhere between “too settled” and “too scattered,” I found myself laughing at the universe for running me straight into my own personal Goldilocks story.

Too slow.

Too wild.

And then, of course, there’s him.

As usual, seeing him felt… easy. Natural. Like slipping into a conversation that doesn’t need warming up. He didn’t stay long, and he doesn’t stay in my life the way some people do. But he stays in my nervous system. He’s the quiet benchmark my heart now uses, whether I want it to or not.

Some people don’t become your forever.  They become your standard.

Somewhere along the way, the Snake year apparently promoted me from “romantic optimist” to “woman who can now spot real connection without needing a group chat, a crystal, or a post-date virtual happy hour analysis .”

So here I am, still shedding. Still evaluating my options.  Still paying attention, but now with better instincts, sharper radar, and a much lower tolerance for nonsense in charming packaging.

The Horse isn’t here yet. I’m not running. I’m not chasing. I’m not sprinting to my fantasy finish line.  I’m standing in the space between who I was and who I’m becoming, asking smarter questions, taking deeper breaths, and finally trusting that what’s meant to keep up with me will.

And I love that my birthday lives here, on the very last day of the Snake. A personal new year inside a universal one. A quiet closing of a chapter before the real momentum begins.

The Snake taught me how to let go with grace.  The Horse, I hope, will teach me how to move forward without leaving myself behind.

For now, I’m still in the in-between. Not lost. Not settled. Just confidently under construction.

And honestly?  I am finally seeing that it is a beautiful place to be.